Thursday, December 13, 2018

Welcome to Family, Ells

Ellie or Mookie?  DLG and G were arguing about the name for the new dog a couple of days before the BIG day.  I piped in with my oh so subtle guilt trip.

"What about Maddie?  That was the name of my dog growing up..."  I might was well have said "before she was tragically taken in a mafioso kidnapping" after that I was laying on it so thick.

Yes, the JMR family was adding another to its brood.  A little Golden doodle would be gracing us with its presence in just a few short days.  While I was counting the mouths that I had to feed (which is typically what I do, it was the role I was made for), everyone else was counting the days until we picked our new addition.  We were receiving videos and pictures of the new puppies every day.  Other expectant dog owners were getting all freaked about the puppies.  I thought I would contain my excitement.

Dog breeders creep me out so I stayed home with C for his baseball practice even though he was perfectly capable of driving himself (a story for another day).

Even though I was dreading the additional mouth to feed, as the day came, I had to say I was excited for the dog myself.    I'm not that much of a miserable SOB for God's sake! The pictures were rolling in as well as updates on where they were after they left the breeders house.

When everyone got home, "Ellie" started bounding around.  Did she know that this was going to be her new home?  I don't know for sure, but she immediately found a comfortable spot on the rug in the Living Room (what we call the big couch room) and stretched out. 

I'm sure we'll have plenty of stories with this little puppy.  So I'll leave it at this...Welcome to the Family Ells!

Wednesday, November 7, 2018

2018 - Another Year, Another World Series Parade

Things have changed a lot since 2013, and things haven't changed at all.  2013 was the last year that we celebrated a Red Sox World Series victory with the Duck Boat parade.  And while 2013 was different in that all of went to Fenway Park on a  Saturday morning and basically missed the whole thing, 2018 saw C, G and I go to the corner of Boylston and Tremont.  They didn't mind since they missed a day of school (What excuse will we give C so he doesn't get detention was a big brainstorm session that LC and I had all week?).

For the uninitiated (or for those from New York, Los Angeles, etc.), after a Boston team wins its championship, the team usually celebrates by getting on Boston's fleet of Duckboats and whips through the Back Bay, usually stopping somewhere around City Hall Plaza so everyone can cheer. I've gone to a couple of the Red Sox parades, a couple of the Patriots parades, and an ill conceived Bruins parade.  I've been lucky, I guess.  I've managed to enjoy myself and managed to avoid all of the Massholes who inevitably show up to these kinds of things.

It was this and 20 pictures of duck boats flying by.
Wednesday, 10am.  Boston.  Really, except for the overwhelming aroma of weed wafting through the air, this parade was similar to the Bruins parade we went to back when they won the Cup in 2011...except that I was happy that it happened.  We were at the turn from Boylston to Tremont.  I thought we got a good vantage point leaning up against a City of Boston Dump truck that was blocking other cars from going down Boylston toward Chinatown.  Little did I know that G did not like this spot.

Then the wait began.  I was probably the oldest in the group hugging Boylston Street by about 20-25 years as every high school student and college student in the greater Boston area decided to skip school.  The idiotic signs, the vaping, the immaturity.  It took me back to when I was that age (except for the vaping - what the Hell is that all about - it's like getting a Raspberry coffee at Starbucks).  The wait was shortened by watching the construction guys banging their hammers and start "Yankees Suck" chants.  It was kind of amusing, even through that chant is as tired as I am.  The crowd seemed less than electric, almost jaded, so when the police started tearing around the corner to signal that the Duck Boats were finally coming around the bend, it was heartening to see the crowd pick up its fervor.  "Let's go Red Sox" began to be the chant.  That's one I can get behind.

The first boats came by.  Steve Pierce, World Series MVP was on the first boat, followed by the entire organization that sits in the back room and mocks you when you pay $100 for an uncomfortable, too small of a seat.  One of the next duckboats had the hangers-on from previous World Series wins - Pedro, Big Papi and Varitek.  At least Jason Varitek was a part of the organization. 

After an endless array of staff duck boats, the boats with players started coming by.  In what was to be a portend of things to come, the players were throwing beer cans to the construction workers in the building across from us - most of the time missing and hitting the scaffolding below.  (Sorry bystanders below!)  Note to self not to enter that building on Tremont Street...those guys were drinking beer!  David Price continued to be defiant in the face of every single person to have doubted him.  Mookie was in the last boat with a bunch of guys I had never heard of.  Well, except for Tzu-Wei Lin.

Let the record show that I said Price was going to have a good Postseason - which was before his dumpster fire in Game 2 of the ALDS against the Yankees.

And then just like that, they were gone.  As we walked back to Southie for lunch, we had to dodge near fistfights and yelling and screaming.  Another year, another reversion back to being Massholes.


Wednesday, October 17, 2018

2018 ALCS - Price's Redemption?

Would this game be David Price's redemption?  His playoff teams (Tampa Bay, Toronto and the Red Sox) had never won a start that he made.  Forget about his win-loss record, his TEAM had not won a game he started.  That is an astounding achievement.  And his poor 1.3 innings in Game 2 of the ALDS against the Yankees did not seem to be a harbinger of good things to come.  All of that being said, G and I decided to make our way do down to Fenway Park for Game 2 of the ALCS against the Astros.

I had taken C to the ALCS during the Red Sox magical 2013 run, and watched a heartbreaking 1-0 shutout loss in Game 1 to Anibel Sanchez.  That game, I had C and G pick a number between 1 and 10.  Tears flowed and pouting ensued, but I explained to G back then that the Red Sox did not get a hit until the 9th inning, and it was too cold for him (That's a lie of course because it can never be too cold for him.  Now my explanation to C was that he had already seen a game and did he really want to sit in those cramped seats again to watch David Price blow it yet again?

C was still pissed...

4pm.  Boston.  Of course, I drove G's ball hawking buddies and we arrived approximately 8 hours early, hoping to get in before the crowds and watch batting practice.  Unlike the game earlier this season, G actually got a ball.  Event though he would have had two if he didn't muff a ball thrown to him that a 6 year old kid dove on the floor to steal away from him.

"Dad, my glove still isn't broken in!" G rationalized to no one in particular because I had stopped listening to that excuse 6 months prior when we got him the new glove.

Had to make up a photo op.
Our seats were farther up the grandstand and a little closer to Home Plate, than the tickets that I shared with friends of mine.  But the view was OK, considering there was a huge stanchion blocking the area between the mound and home plate.  I thought, well this isn't too bad until I missed a pivotal error in the first inning that helped the Red Sox take a 2-0 lead.  I guess it didn't matter because David Price immediately gave up the lead and then some by letting the Astros put up a 2 spot in the second inning and then two more in the third.  For crying aloud, does David Price suck! I thought to myself.

But just when I thought that this game was going to start to slip away, Jackie Bradley Jr. (of all batters) turned a Garrit Cole fastball around and hit a bases clearing double to take the lead again in the 4th inning 5-4.  Now all Price had to do was get through the 5th inning and he was in line for the win.  His first in 50 career Playoff starts (or something close to that)

Well that was not to be.  Price got two quick outs int eh Fifth Inning then walked two straight batters with the top of the lineup turning over.  After leaving with two outs in the Fifth, Price was one precious out away from possibly winning a start.   But it was not meant to be.

The Red Sox bullpen, led by Matt Barnes, Ryan Brazier and Rick Porcello, recorded three Holds while the Red Sox took a 7-4 lead.  And while Craig Kimbrel came in with some lighter fluid in the 9th Inning to make it interesting, the Red Sox won the game 7-5 to tie the ALCS up at 1-1.

And David Price got his first "team" win.  The first time in history a player boasted about a "team" win.  But baby steps are all we have...well that and a couple of baseballs.  

Friday, September 28, 2018

Boston Seaport - An Oral History

Oh boy, I thought to myself.  We have a 16 year old, a 14 year old and a 12 year old at this point and its always an adventure to get them to agree to do anything.  When Jen said she reserved a room in South Boston for the night and all 5 of us were going to go, I thought that the crap was going to hit the fan. 

What follows is an oral history of that weekend.

Friday

C:  I really did not want to go to Boston with Mom and Dad.  I wanted to play Fortnite in my dungeon lair (our basement) and tell my head set buddies how awful they are at the game.  I am Massachusetts Ninja.

G:  I really didn't want to go to Boston with Mom and Dad.  I want to play Fortnite in my office lair.  I want to stare at the TV from one foot away and tell my headset buddies how good I am.

DLG:  I wanted to go to Boston because I like hotels.  Wait, I have to sleep on the floor again?  Forget it, I just wanted to stay home and play on my iPad.  I hate sleeping on the floor.

Me:  I thought...Hell, if we can we get burgers and beers and leave the kids in the room alone on Friday night, I'm in, I guess.

Jen:  I just wanted to have all 5 of us do something fun.  I didn't think everyone would be complaining.

After lunch at Tony C's and a walk to the Faneuil Hall/Aquarium area we were already starting to get tired.

G:  My feet were killing me.

Me:  My feet were killing me, but I put on a brave face.  Also the sunset was pretty cool.

Best picture of five taken
Jen:  JMR's  and G's constant whining about the walk were really starting to annoy me.  At least C and DLG weren't noticeably unhappy.  Well at least not until I asked them to take a picture along the water.  That's when things really got out of hand.

C:  This sucked.  I was bored out of my mind.

DLG:  It was OK, although Mom and Dad did not want to buy me anything.  They kept saying no.  Stuffed animals - no.  Fancy pens and other art pieces, no.  Clothes - no.

After dropping them off in the room, Jen and I proceeded to hit the Town.  Going to a couple of bars and then out to eat at a Mexican restaurant that featured meth head customers and a clear drug dealer as a food runner.  Food was good.  We retired for the night around Midnight.

Saturday

G:  I had trouble sleeping since Jen and I were sharing a twin bed.  DLG was on the floor next to me, C was on a pull out and G had the other small bed.  I chose to walk around and get a Starbucks.

Eventually, everyone got their acts together and we made another trek to downtown.  This was an even farther walk, going to lunch int eh North End.

DLG:  I didn't like pizza, so I got spaghetti.

C:  I got pizza because I'm pickier than an 80 year old man.

G:  I got pizza because I couldn't decide.  But my feet hurt again.

We then made the brave decision to go back to Southie and go bowling.

Jen:  My foot hurt so I thought a good idea would be to take us all bowling.  No activity soothes feet like the stopping and starting of bowling in bowling shoes that are always 2 sizes too small.

C:  I'm the best bowler in the family.  It doesn't matter what our scores are.

G:  I'll go bowling but can we get an Uber back?

Me:  I would rather walk back.  Maybe they will forget about bowling.  Also, the peace and quiet of the solo walk back (the boys' bickering was driving me crazy)

DLG:  I decided to walk back with Dad.  He seemed sad that we were all going to Uber back to the bowling alley.

C:  Even though I was throwing gutter ball after gutter ball, my speed was off the charts.  Yeah it was an 8 pound ball, but it was flying!

Me:  My shoulder was going to be killing me after this.

Jen:  Ha! I had no intention of bowling, I just wanted to have a glass of wine without anyone bothering me to leave for an hour.

G:  I just wanted to rest.  I thought that maybe bowling with two hands would make things easier.  They didn't.  No one noticed that I almost fell over a couple of times.

C:  At least I wasn't falling over throwing the ball.

After a couple of minutes at the Park on D, we then headed home.  Everyone got what they wanted at that point.

C: Fortnite

G:  Fortnite and a chair

DLG:  Home to my bed.

Jen:  Home to the couch.

Me:  I guess I'll do the laundry, dishes and lawn.


Wednesday, August 1, 2018

South Carolina is Hot in the Summer - Chick Fil A Edition

Charleston, South Carolina is really hot in the Summer.  I mean really hot.  Think about how hot it is where you are right now.  That is nowhere near how hot it is in Charleston in the Summer.

With this as a backdrop, C had his annual baseball field trip for his AAU team.  Three years ago, it was Flemington, New Jersey.  Two years ago it was Omaha, Nebraska.  Last year it was Reading and Hershey, Pennsylvania.  This year, we were on our way to the Lowcountry.  At least it was an interesting area outside of baseball.

Day 1.  The team won handily in its first game, beating a team from North Carolina (or South Carolina, I get those places mixed up) at the College of Charleston's baseball park, which is actually in Mount Pleasant.  C played LF and walked a couple of times.

No Bueno
In the second game, C was scheduled to pitch.  It was what I was told to be the best team in our pool.  C came out firing the ball.  An uncatchable pop up was the only difference between a goose egg and one run.  We were down 1-0 after one half inning.  As we're warming up to hit in the bottom of the first, a storm cloud appeared out of nowhere.  The oppressive heat was shoved aside by 40 mph winds.  Not long after came the downpours.  And Jesus did it rain hard for a couple of hours. It didn't stop us from making a sprint for the car after the game was cancelled.

Day 2.  For some reason, C was brought on to pitch the following game on the following day at a high school field on Daniel Island (where I will retire one day).  Questionable decision making by the coach since C was telling me about his dead arm that night.  The game did not go well after the first couple of innings.  Usually throwing the ball in the low to mid 80s, C's fastball was more of a batting practice fastball.  After 3 runs in 2 innings, C was taken out.  Although we rallied toward the end of the game, we ended up losing 4-2. 

In the second game at Charleston Southern University (A division 1 school that I had never heard of), we played arguably the worst team.  C was playing CF this game so he was hitting this game.  After two more walks (or maybe a HBP, who knows) and 4 stolen bases, C hit a deep fly ball to Left Center.  It was well struck and it is.....Caught a few steps from the fence.  We ended up winning this game a lot to a little.

College of Charleston - Brett Gardner Territory
Day 3.  For some reason, C was brought on to pitch against the team he pitched against on Day 1 back at College of Charleston.  Serious deja vu right now.  The Coach was so pissed at another kid for screwing up a bunt play that apparently he didn't notice that C was barely getting the ball over the plate yesterday, and when he did he was throwing it about as hard as a 10 year old.  Maybe he thought this team would be flummoxed by change up after change up?  Regardless, C gutted through a tough outing, giving up 4 total runs in 4 innings.  The coach ended up giving up the game and we lost a lot to a little. 

Now the waiting game was upon us.  We were 2-2, and gave up 15 runs.  Runs allowed would determine whether we made the playoffs or not.  At the end, we were found to be the 8 seed.  While the playoffs are nice, we would have to win 4 more games to win the tournament.  With our pitching in shambles, this was not going to work out that great.  Unfortunately, I was right.  We ended up getting a mercy rule game in the 8-9 play in game.  Tournament over.

Jesus, its Monday early afternoon and we don't go home until Thursday.  Well at least C had a good time with his buddies for most of the time (I forced him to go to dinner with me once and forced him to go to Fort Sumter as well).  Me personally, I spent the next tow days walking around in the oppressive heat and humidity and then went to dinner with friends.  All in all an enjoyable time.

Next weekend?  That's right, G on the Cape.  Or is it playoffs in New Hampshire and Maine?  I can't keep track.  

Tuesday, June 19, 2018

My Last Game as a Youth Sports Coach

I was checking around G's baseball team to see who could make it to a playoff game, when the mom of one of my best players, said what can only be described as fitting words.  Her son had stopped playing baseball and was hanging up his spikes.  After 250 baseball games, 120 basketball games, 50 football games and 10 soccer games, JMR has stopped coaching and is mercifully hanging up his spikes.

One of the few games where I coached C and G together.
C was just 7 years old when I started to get the coaching bug.  Soccer of all sports was my first foray into coaching after LC thought that I should get into it.  Everyone will agree that I am a terrible parent when watching my children play sports.  I tend to bitch and moan a lot - sometimes at the coaching and some times at the umpiring.  I talk trash to opposing teams - the "wooing soccer mom syndrome" rattles me every time.  And I have a vicious competitive streak, to such an extent that LC will slowly move away from me as the game goes on.  She thinks that I don't notice when she does it, but I do. 

The thing is is that a lot of that generally went away when I coached.  I was still very competitive - A referee once told me to get my nitro out as I was screaming after a play ended in 3RD GRADE FOOTBALL - but the screaming wasn't vicious.  G would get mad at me because I would bat everyone everywhere in the order and wanted everyone to pitch. A basketball referee actually asked ME to calm my head coach down after a terrible call.  Coaching had a soothing effect on my vicariousness.

These basketballs sure look lonely
And the amount of coaching that I did tended to be on the ridiculous side.  There were some years where coached C and G in baseball, coached G in travel and Rec basketball and coached G in football. Coaching in 2012 and 2013 was like another full time job.  And just when I started dialing it back with the boys, I started coaching DLG in Summer, AAU and travel basketball.  Why did I do this to myself?  These were the best of times because I loved spending the time, but it was also the worst of times because it affected my work and I was always exhausted.  I would lay awake thinking mostly about football.  Saturdays and Sundays in the Fall were all about watching film, drawing up game plans and thinking about how to get an edge.  Yeah, LC doesn't miss those days.

But sometimes, I do.

The last coaching I did was for G's Junior Baseball league.  Once the kids were done with the Cooperstown team as 12 year olds, interest started to wane.  It was always a struggle to field 9 kids, even though I had 15 kids on my team.  But there I was trying to win games and make the kids a little bit better.  It was sometimes a drag because of the weather or because I was busy at work, but once I got out into the field, all the juices came back.  We were like the Celtics because two of our best players never showed up tot he games and we still went 8-2.  (That tie was a win in my books).  Because C was young enough to play in Juniors himself, I tried to talk him into playing with us.  Except for some Summer League games, I never got the chance to coach them together...they were probably fine with it.

Yeah, I'll be back next year.


Saturday, May 19, 2018

Maybe the Celtics' Opponents Just Aren't Very Good?

A lot has been made about the Celtics' 2018 playoff run.  After a shaky 4-3 series win over the Milwaukee Bucks, the Celtics cruised through the conference semifinals with a 4-1 victory over the upstart 76ers and are up 2-0 versus LeBron James and the vaunted Cavaliers. A lot of reasons have been discussed about the Celtics run without their two best players, Kyrie Irving and Gordon Hayward, even suiting up, much less putting 20 points up per game.

He really doesn't have anything to do with it.
Brad Stevens is the most important person on this team, some reports have stated.  Jaylen Brown and Jayson Tatum have emerged as the next superstars of the NBA, other reports have exclaimed.  Scary Terry Rozier and Marcus "trash talk" Morris have come out of nowhere to put up huge numbers when just a couple of months ago, they were nice complimentary pieces expected to work 10-15 minutes a game.  But I have it figured out.  And these reasons are not the REAL reason for the Celtics 2018 playoffs.   

Maybe, just maybe, their opponents suck?

Brad Stevens is not any more a coaching genius than I am.  He's a good Xs and Os coach who has good out of bounds plays and can't settle on a rotation to save his life.  Jaylen Brown and Jayson Tatum are good young players.  Of course they will average 18 points a game, though, if they are logging 35-40 minutes on a team that doesn't really have natural scorers.  Terry Rozier and Marcus Morris are having good series as starters, but they are not difference makers.  All the hype though may get us a first round draft pick for Rozier so I won't complain.  Thief Danny will find some lousy team to deal Rozier to in the off season, I'm sure.

But frankly, its the team defense and sharing of the ball that has led to the Celtics' success.  In a league of superstars, me-first mentalities, touches and general selfishness, defense and passing almost seem like novel concepts.  Believe it or not, the closest parallel I can think of is the UConn Women's basketball team.  They practice sharing the ball and defense almost exclusively.  The sets that they run and suffocating defenses they play have led to what seems like 50 years of dominance.  All an NBA team has to do to win in this league is commit to passing the ball and defense.  Maybe this has something to do with Stevens, but that is a mentality that comes with being the underdog because of injuries.

The unselfish passing I'm seeing with this team has been leading to open threes and layups.  the Cavs look old, tired and disinterested in playing defense.  They simply look like they suck.  The best thing I saw in Game 2 was James going off and still losing by 10+ points.  That means that someone else needs to step up to win this series with James.  Won't happen if everyone else sucks.

The suffocating defense has been leading to open jump shots and layups in transition.  It has been leading to terrible shooting and decision making.  That game against the 76ers, where Boston kept stealing the ball during out of bounds plays, was a perfect example of a defense that had something to prove.  Do you think that defense shows up if Irving and Hayward were out there?  Probably not because they don't have anything to prove.  Thee 76ers believed their own hype, but unfortunately, they suck.

So let's win two more games, have the Warriors and Rockets beat the snot out of one another in the Western Conference Finals and finally raise Number 18.

Thursday, April 12, 2018

So Ball-Hawking is a Thing

So we finally had our day in the Fenway seats.  Although this was the first game our season tickets could go to, Ive had these seats - and was looking forward to this game for months.  Not only that, but it was the first game against the retooled Yankees and G wanted to see Aaron Judge and GianCarla Stanton. But when G informed me that we had to take one of his buddies to the game so they could "ball hawk," I was intrigued.

On the ride in, we started talking about it.  G and his buddy started talking about this guy named Zack Hample and his 10,000 baseballs.  They started to watch his videos and talk about the games he was at.  I had a lot of pressing questions that I kept to myself.  For instance, how can he afford to go to so many games in so many cities that he could collect 10,000 baseballs?  Finally, I piped in with a question.

"Where do you keep 10,000 baseballs?" I asked.  They were stumped but G's buddy said that he would eventually sell his baseballs before he got to 10,000.  He figured he could sell his baseballs for 25 dollars a piece.  I stifled a laugh.

Hour 1 of 7...
But undeterred, they started plotting out their night.  They had Yankee hats so they could hang out by the Yankee dugout without repercussions.  They were able to get in early to watch batting practice (but it was cancelled!) and to generally pester ushers to get closer to the bullpens.  They had their seats lined up when the game got late, and they knew what to say to the bat boy to try and get balls.  Seriously, I wish these kids spent this much time on their homework.  But because we had gotten in to park two and half hours early, all we could do was stare at each other.  The kids just played catch.  Little did I know that this would just be a fraction of the entire time I was in there.

But there was a game too.  Almost from the beginning, you knew that it was going to be the Red Sox's night.  Mookie Betts hit a laser beam double of the monster and scored on a Hanley Ramirez single.  They took a 4-0 lead in the Second Inning when Benintendi hooked a triple down the Right Field line and scored on another single from Hanley.  It seemed like that would be enough since Chris Sale was throwing the ball WELL.

After Aaron Judge smacked a 440 foot home run into Center field to make the game 5-1 int he 5th inning, the Red So absolutely went off.  JD Martinez hit a bomb 420 feet for run scoring Double.  And After a Sacrifice Fly, error and Walk made the score 10-1, Mookie Betts came up again and hit a bomb over everything in Left Field for a Grand Slam to make the score 14-1.  The park was going crazy!

Now after a score like this and the 35 degree weather, I would have talked my crew into leaving.  But not tonight.  When the 8th inning started and Yankees fans, who came in droves, started leaving the dugout area, G and his buddy made their move.  Although the protective netting had been extended to the Foul Ball alley, there was an area  near the dug out that was (apparently) a prime area to get a ball from the ball boy.

And boy did they try.  Remember, we got into the park at 4:30.  At 11pm, 30 minutes after the last pitch was thrown, I get a text from G.  They were coming back in about 10 minutes.  There was no one left in the stands or on the field.  What the Hell were they waiting for?  Any way, at 11:30 they finally get back.  They both ended up with baseballs that they got from the ball boy.  I'm not sure, but G's buddy may have given him a ball.

When we finally get home after Midnight, I decided that G should find a different hobby than ball-hawking.

Monday, February 26, 2018

The Last Time at Epcot Center?

First in 2009, we discovered how one could visit the countries of Europe and enjoy a lovely time exploring various cultures (wink, wink).  Then in 2012 we journeyed back, a couple of years older and a couple years wiser (we stayed at a place that allowed us to walk to Epcot - and easily walk out of Epcot).

As the kids have gotten older, I am now starting to wonder if our 2017 trip to Epcot is going to be the last one we take as a family.  Our schedules are taking us in a million different directions, and our pockets are clear out of spending money.  Sadly, this may be our last sojourn into the future world.  But before we get all moisty-eyed, lets discuss this trip.

5 million people just out of focus
It was a couple of days after Christmas.  I picked this day after an enjoyable day at Busch Gardens thinking that this might be one day that won't be crazy - midweek, weather was not going to be great, and everyone would go on the weekend.  We stayed at the Caribbean Beach Resort and took the tram to the park.  Although it was mid day, I was heartened by being the only people on the bus.  Sadly, there was a good reason why no one was on the bus, they were all at the park.

When  we get to the park, we were struck just by how busy it was.  We tried to see what Fast Track and Soarin' were up to in wait times and it was impossible that the lines could be that long. The fast pass system has changed in the last 5 years; they were all sold out.  3-4 hour wait times at Fast Track? Even G wasn't up for the wait.  We then walked over to Soarin'.  The wait was only 90 minutes and I liked the trivia game that you could play while you waited.  Lets do it! So while DLG and LC were getting caricatures done near France, the boys and I started our slow march to the ride.

2 hours later, we get off the ride.  Of course it wasn't worth that long of a wait, but it was enjoyable once we got there.  We go back and meet the girls and have some pizza in Italy.

It's now been 4 hours since we stepped foot in the park.  We now have one ride, and a 35 dollar pizza to show for it.  We walk around to see what the other rides are like.  Spaceship Earth was going to be two hours.  Even rides like journey to the imagination had one hour wait times.  So back to Soarin' we go.  This time with all five of us.

After our second time through the line, (Make it 7 hours at the park), we decided to go to a different place for dinner outside of the park, thinking that the rides at night would not be as long since the families with the small kids would be leaving.  But if anything, the crowds got bigger!  It was now night time.  All the rides had two or three hour wait times.  Even past the time that the park closed for Gods sake.  The countries were packed like we walking past Times Square.

We even tried Test Track one more time.  I became nervous when they closed the doors behind us. Uh, were the last riders of the night? That cant be a good thing, hurdling down the track with a bunch of tired 22 year olds looking to go out at the club.  Lets take a couple of pictures and go home, I declared.

The constant walking led to the kids agree with my declaration.  The frustration with the lack of rides and the 5 million people wore us all down.  Everyone just wanted to go back to the hotel room and relax for our long trip home in the morning.  At least we got quality time with the kids in the room instead of screaming time in the park.  Not so bad.  And maybe this wont be our last trip. 

Saturday, February 10, 2018

Unsolved Mysteries and the 2018 New England Patriots

Scene and Action!  Robert Stack comes in from a foggy road "join us and you might be able to help us solve...a mystery.  Cut to Keely Shaye Smith staring the camera down describing the mysteries that are unfolding at Patriot Place.  The Patriots, coming off of a thrilling OT Super bowl win over the Falcons, were looking to make it three Super Bowl wins in 4 years.  But in the days leading up to the Super Bowl and definitely the days after the devastating loss, some questions remained unanswered:

What the Hell is going on down there?

Tom Brady.  In what was supposed to be a thinly veiled infomercial for TB12, Tom vs. Time was actually quite enjoyable.  Showing Tom Brady as a human being - dealing with his kids, making fun of his friends and taking to coaching from Tom House of all people - actually made me like him more than I already did.  The idea is that Brady IS actually a good guy.  If you cut out some of the creepier moments, particularly the ones that featured Robert Guerrero, and this was Emmy worthy.  But the question lingers...why did he release these videos in the week before the Super Bowl?  Were they released to show that Tom was actually a good guy, and not the Machiavellian puppetmaster who engineered a Jimmy G trade to the 49ers?  And what about that alligator in his TB Times?

Bill Belichick.  Malcolm Butler?  I understand that Butler is undersized so he is not a great matchup on the Eagles taller wide receivers. But when it was clear that Eric Rowe and Jordan Richards could not cover or tackle ANYONE, would it not be a smart move to see if Butler could make a difference, especially given that he would be fired up for the benching?  Even on 3rd and long when it was clear that the Eagles had to pass to a receiver?  So clearly something happened in the week before the Super Bowl and the Patriots agreed to not call it discipline so Butler's value would not be further diminished.  What is it with undersized athletes from Boston and their fortunes when Boston is done with them? Isaiah Thomas is shrugging his shoulders as we speak.

Rob Gronkowski.  Will he retire or not?  I'm kind of tired of this guy.  He always hurt, he always says or does something stupid.  And now he is taking advice from the Rock that he should become a movie star.  Have you seen him answer questions?  He's too goofy to be in a movie like San Andreas or Skyscraper.  And then, what happened to his Foxboro home.  Someone stole his SAFE and other belongings.  Does this guy not have security?  Even I have a security system, and I'm a schlep.

Josh McDaniels.  Man, this guy is wishy washy as all get out, huh?  He took his name out of the running last year for a couple of jobs.  This year, the Colts issued a press release introducing McDaniels has their new coach.  During his exit interview IN FOXBORO of all places with Bob Kraft, something happened.  McDaniels did an about face and said he was staying.  If coach goes, I go.  Was he promised the head coaching position in a year or two?  Was he given the ability to draft his own quarterback this April?  Was he given a tour of the Eye?  No one knows and in true Patriot fashion, no one is talking.

The cult of personality in Foxboro is unlike any other place in sports.  No one talks.  The players, even the ones with personality, always look like they are suffering from Stockholm Syndrome.  When players leave, they usually get hurt or fade away into oblivion.  Something is going on in Foxboro, and I'm getting apprehensive just thinking about it.  Hopefully there is some sort of update next season saying that a caller knows whats going on.

Monday, January 15, 2018

Avoiding the Tampa Serial Killer at Busch Gardens

Just kidding about the the Tampa serial killer.  Well, not kidding about his existence, just kidding that we just avoided him.  Let's forget about him for a second, though, since he was captured the week before we arrived.  Our fourth annual winter vacation took us this time around to my Brother's house down in Tampa and my Mother's rental house just outside of Orlando (for another time).  It seems like just yesterday that my brother up and left Oregon and moved to Tampa, but it was almost a year ago.  Jeez, how time flies. 

We were all excited to escape the cold here in Boston and spend some time underneath the lanai.  The first thing that I wanted to do with the kids though was to go to Busch Gardens.  Not that I wanted to ride the rides anymore; I'm too old and fat for that anymore - but I wanted the kids to have some fun so they would keep coming with us on our vacations (Note that I did not necessarily feel this way at the end of the vacation...).

Tampa, FL.  10am.  Thanks to some deft half price tickets from my Florida-resident brother, the clown car was loaded up for the day as we drove across town to the park.  It was warm and sunny, and the kids were trying to decide what they wanted to do.  But the adults wanted to get away from the throngs near the entrance, so we moved toward the safari train.  Watching hippos and giraffes slowly amble by as the conductor was tooting his horn to make them move, I was instantly reminded of our Christmas Eve at my Mom's retirement community a couple of days earlier. 

As we moved toward the other end of the park, I started reminding G and DLG about that time 5 years ago when G and I went on the same water ride at Animal Kingdom 5 times in 20 minutes.  DLG, thinking she missed something, asked me if we could go on this water ride.  I think it was called white water rapids, or something benign like that. 

"Yes!" I answered.  I'm not sure if I was slyly smiling or not at that point, but  I didn't have the heart to tell her that we were going to get really wet.  I mean so wet that we would regret not wearing slides or some other shoes that could get soaked.  While not a ride that would scare the crap out of someone, I did instantly regret going on this ride at the beginning of the day.  I spent the rest of the day walking around barefoot as I tried to dry my shoes out.

Fast forward to after the aforementioned soaking, DLG and I caught up to the rest of the family.  The kids' aunt, a notorious roller coaster hunter, talked the kids into going onto Shiekra, one of the 200 foot drop rides.  I merely said that it wasn't that bad.  Honestly, I had no idea, but they weren't going to find out milling around the table we were stationed at.  It was also the ride with the shortest wait, which is what I always look for.

90 minutes later.   I guess that line wasn't as short as we thought.  The kids were still talking about the ride and how it was a lot worse than they thought (whoops!).  After some more searching around for a ride, we settled on taking the tram around the park in order to get over to the gaming area. 

As the kids aunt and uncle went to get a beer, G and C shot three pointers at the basketball court, while DLG was trying to scale a rope walk.  Oh great, an opportunity to win some cheap crap that I had to find room for on the flight home.  And wait, I had to pay even more for them to do this stuff?  Really?

The only thing that stopped the games from continuing was the impending darkness and my empty pockets, so we joined my brother at the beer gardens.  We were all tired from the sun and the walking around so it was nice to get a drink and people watch.  Finally, we called it quits and took the long walk back to the car.  What a great time I thought to myself as I was continuing to air out my sneakers from the ride 6 hours ago.  Note to self for next time.   

Tuesday, January 2, 2018

Is Isaiah Thomas a Forgettable Celtic?

It's Isaiah Thomas' first game with the Cavaliers tonight.  I have to admit that I totally forgot that he hadn't played a game since hurting his hip in the playoffs last year. The boys both ask me when and where the game is on.  I'm mildly interested, but only because there is no football on.  It's really tough for me to watch the Cavs unless they are playing the Celtics.  It's not that I dislike the Cavs, I just don't like LeBron, Dwyane Wade, Jr Smith and Kevin Love.  I guess I just don't like the Cavs.

"I think ESPN or TNT."  I answer looking around at espn.com.

"It's his first game back." C tells me, in a way to explain his interest.  I thought the Cavs were going to play Jose Calderon at the point all year, I thought to myself.

IT4 in Happier Times
We then watch a preview where IT asks the Celtics not to give them the video montage during the game tomorrow night.  Incidentally, he has decided not to play against the Celtic in the second game of the back to back, so we'll have to be satisfied with watching him play against the Blazers.  The report then goes on to show a Twitter war between Thomas and some hockey tool named Jimmy Murphy who called for Thomas to get over himself.  For Christ's sake!  My question is...who cares?  He was with the Celtics for two and half years.  And while he averaged 25 points a game, the Celtics didn't win any championships with him in the line up.  To get to the Warriors' level, the Celtics had to blow things up, use their considerable draft assets and look for a charismatic superstar who can bring the bench players with him.  This is today's NBA and no offense to him, but Thomas' 25 points a night were never going to be enough.

It's in this backdrop that I switch the game on.  Thomas isn't starting, but that does not surprise me.  He comes in in the middle of the first quarter and proceeds to score 8 points on 2 of 6 shooting while handing out 2 assists.  Surprisingly, he has neither a block, steal nor a steal in the first half.  He did pick up a technical foul though.  The Blazers win the first half, 56-53.  I started thinking about where he would be placed in the list of all time Celtics.  Let's just say he would not be placed that high.  Oh Yeah, Damian Lillard is leading the Blazers in scoring with 19 points.  I forgot to mention that the Cavs are not playing against themselves.

I turn the game back in the second half just in time to see the IT timeline.  Drafted at the second round by the Kings (of course the Kings screwed this one up), Thomas was then shipped off to the Suns in the hopes of winning the NBA Championship (just kidding).  While he was a two time all star with the Celtics, I had forgotten that he averaged 20 points a game in Sacramento too.

As the game goes on, IT looks rusty and is being outdone by another former Celtic - Jae Crowder.  I wonder if Jimmy Murphy chirped Crowder about cheering for Gordon Hayward on his way out of Boston.

Anyway, Thomas ends the game with 16 points and 3 assists.  The Cavs, led improbably by Dwyane Wade start pulling away from the Blazers and end up winning by more than 10 points.  And I finished a Cavs blog without talking about LeBron more than just a passing mention of how I think he sucks.