Tim Wakefield's Revenge - 2009 ALCS Review

I remember that night back in 2003.  Sitting in the beer stained pub down the street.  Grady Little letting a 160 pound Dominican wrap him around his finger like a little girl.  The hits from Jeter and Matsui.  The tense 9th and 10th innings.  Then, the inevitable home run by Aaron Boone against Tim Wakefield.  Wakefield had pitched beautifully in this series, winning Game One and Game 4.  And these memories are still burned into my brain like fluttering demons.  In 2004, I tried to talk my friends into going into same bar we were in the previous year to exercise those remaining demons.  Same with 2007.  We never made it there that night or any night for that matter, and perhaps that's why this is still an important series to me, even if the rest of the country couldn't care less.  I want to exercise those demons still.  And so does Tim Wakefield.  It didn't happen in 2007 because Joba had those darn bug problems.  2008 was a washout because the Yankees were eliminated in the ALDS.  Wait, what, they didn't even make the playoffs that year?  Oh that's right, I was trying to remember the last time the Yankees won the World Series and I lost track. 

Fast forward to 2009.  The Red Sox won the first 8 games and the Yankes won 9 of the last 10.  Yankees fans will say that the 8-0 mark was a result of new guys trying to "chemie" one another.  (And A-Roid's secret one month drug ban).  Red Sox fans will say that the last three games didn't matter and besides the Yankees cheat. 

In their respective ALDS, the Yankees swept the Minnesota Twins. The Red Sox just handed the Angels their third consecutive defeat. The series that always seems to get more hype than it should is taking shape before our eyes. Yankees vs Red Sox IV.  What's going to happen?

October 16, 2009.  New York, NY.  Jon Lester, with his 2.84 ERA in Yankee Stadium in 2009 (No, I don't count the game where Melky Cabrera intentionally hit Lester in the knee with a baseball) dominates the Yankees' line up for 7 innings, giving up 1 run with 9 strikeouts.  CC Sabathia, on the other hand, remembering that the team is really counting on him now, takes a break from the cheeseburger and fries to throw up respectable numbers (for him and his 7.92 post season ERA) - 5 innings, 6 earned runs.   This game is over before it starts.  RED SOX 6 YANKEES 1.

October 17, 2009.  New York, NY.  Jose Molina and Jorge Posada start scratching each other's faces trying to catch AJ Burnett.  Ladies, please.   Meanwhile, Josh Beckett dominates in the playoffs, period.  Alright except for last year, got it.  AJ Burnett gives up 20 runs in 20 innings against the Red Sox.  J.D. Drew and David Ortiz hit home runs into the night.  AJ Burnett gets so melancholy he wants to punch Derek Jeter's permasmirk off of his face.  RED SOX 8 YANKEES 2.

October 19, 2009.  Boston, MA.  Clay Buchholz, the manchild, is in way over his head.  After a third shaky start in a row against the Angels in the ALDS, Bucholz proceeds to give up four home runs.  One to Damon around the Pesky Pole, one to A-Fraud into the Monster seats, one to Robinson Cano into the bullpen and one to Tex Mex (he gives me heartburn everytime I see his ugly mug, the jerk) to straight away center field.  Meanwhile Andy Pettitte continues his recent mastery over the Red Sox and throws a gem.  Get tickets to this game if you want to try to get a souvenir home run ball.  YANKEES 9  RED SOX 4.

October 20, 2009.  Boston, MA.  This is even worse.  Even though CC Sabathia's Fenway Park split is mediocre (4.61 ERA).  He can certainly out pitch Daisuke Matsuzaka.  When the year started, I had Dice learning the system and pitching 215 innings and winning 18-20 games.  Instead, we got this.  YANKEES 8 RED SOX 3.

October 22, 2009. Boston, MA  Jon Lester hits Melky Cabrera in the third inning and everyone outside of New York cheers.  I wish it were Johnny Damon, Jeter, Posada, A-Rod, etc., but I'm still pleased.  He then masters the Yankees again to give the Red Sox a 3-2 lead.  Dustin Pedroia finally comes through with 3 hits and 2 RBIs.  RED SOX 4  YANKEES 2.

October 24, 2009.  New York, NY.  This is the best game of the series so far.  Jeter leads off with a double and gets driven in by a Tex-Lax single.  These are the only Yankees base runners until the 6th inning.  Meanwhile, Andy Pettitte, who never has great post season statistics or games specifically against the Red Sox, pours it on.  1-0 into the top of the ninth.  Mariano Rivera comes in.  I throw Bill Mueller and Dave Roberts hand made dolls at him.  I start singing "Tessie," anything to get this guy off his game.  AND IT WORKS!  Mike Lowell hits a single.  Joey Gathright pinch runs for him and of course steals second.  This kid has just gotten himself a job for life in Boston (See the aforementioned Dave Roberts).  JD Drew, 3 for 24 in the series, with 7 called strikeouts, hits a grounder between stone hips (Jeter) and no hips (A-Roid).  TIE SCORE!  Not a fairy tale ending in this one, though, as in the bottom of the ninth, Billy Wagner gives up the walk off to Texeira.  I hope we get a couple of good players from the draft for this stiff.  YANKEES 2 RED SOX 1.

October 25, 2009.  New York, NY.  Clay Buchholz vs. CC Sabathia.  This is what playoff baseball is all about; and for the 3rd time in seven years, the Red Sox and the Yankees are going to play Game 7.  I'm watching the game hunkered down with a couple of friends.  I don't remember 2004 or 2007 at this point.  I remember Bucky Dent and Ray Knight and Aaron Boone (Beep, beep, beep).  I thought I forgave Bill Buckner when he came out at the ring ceremony a couple years ago (although we all forgave him when he came back to play at the end of his career, no?), but I had the same look of disbelief that Buckner had when Johnny Damon hit the grand slam against Buchholz.  Really, is this bizarro Johnny?  A grand slam at Yankee Stadium in Game 7 of an ALCS?  I could hit a home run in that band box, but that's not the point.  This is not the Red Sox of old.  They haven't been for 5 years.  Although the Yankees lead by 6 in the third inning, five straight hits from Youk, Papi, J-Bay, Mikey and JD Drew (I don't know a good nickname for him except for "Called Strike Three" or "CST" for short) cut the lead in half.  And then an opposite field home run by Youk in the fourth ties the game.  Francona needs to get Buchholz out of there as he gives up a couple of more runs and begins to openly cry. 

I had forgotten that Wakefield was put on the roster because his back had finally responded to treatment (I think he had both hips replaced, but that's just me), so I was surprised to see him come out of the bull pen to start the 5th inning.  One, two, three inning in the 5th.  Maybe this could be it!  The innings get later and later.  The Red Sox tie the score at 8 in the 7th inning and take the lead in the 8th when the most maligned player of the year, David Ortiz, hits a towering home run near the Utz sign.  We are in euphoria!  We all hug each other in manly ways.  Papelbon comes in the 9th to finish the game and the RED SOX ADVANCE!  Wakefield comes waddling out slaps a couple of guys on the back because he's too old and fragile to dive on the pile.   RED SOX 9  YANKEES 8.

Wakefield was able to exercise some demons this night.  Game 7, Yankee Stadium. I cringed when Pedro came out in Game 7 against the Yankees in 2004, because that seemed forced.  The Red Sox needed Wakefield to save a spent bullpen and he came through this time.  Was this the reason why he wouldn't retire event though he had plenty of money and two rings?  It was inevitable that these two teams would face each other again, while he was still able to pitch.  Maybe.

By the way, these hugs and cheers when the game is over take place at the same tavern that I was in on that fateful night 6 years earlier.  I had come here in the 6th inning when Wakefield came out.  A lot of the same people were here, too.  And it was comforting to see their faces.  Maybe now I can talk rationally with my children about the Red Sox, now that I've been able to settle this remaining debt.  We'll see when the Sox play Manny and the Dodgers in the World Series.  

Who Can Beat Jmann Review? NFL Game Blog #2

After a sterling 8-8 showing in Week 2, Jmann Review, C and G are back for more in Week 4.  The games appear a little easier to pick as several teams just plain stink.  2 or 3 game teases should be your preferred choice of the day against these teams.  C and G get their football jerseys on, and, after telling them that this time they are playing for real money, they watch the NFL Network's pregame show with me to prime their picks.  More importantly, Jmann Review continues its long journey to a .500 record.

Baltimore
New England (-1.5)

C:  New England.  "They're the best team."
G:  New England.  "They're the best team."
C:  "You are such a copycat!"  "I hate you, you are such a butthead!"
Jmann Review:  I like New England at home.  Baltimore has never won in Foxboro and in fact has been blown out twice by a combined score of 44-6.  Now we're going to take a little break so that my assistants may experience a little "attitude adjustment."

All right, that "attitude adjustment" actually resulted in bedtime.  Now we're we're sitting here on Sunday morning.  I've switched up the order so I don't have to hear the words "Copycat" or "Butthead."

Green Bay
Minnesota (-4)

G:  Minnesota.  "Because there is a king in the world and he'll play for the Vikings!  Will the King play for the Vikings?"
C:  Minnesota.  "Vikings kill people.  I've seen them do that on Spongebob."  I guess that's another show I have to block on cable.  I lose another babysitter, too.
Jmann Review:  Minnesota.  I don't think the players care about Brett Favre nearly as much as the fans do.  Minnesota will win in a walkover.  But Favre will throw three interceptions in the process.

Dallas
Denver (+3)

G:  Dallas.  "Because I picked them last time."  Good memory; I hope he remembers that he has to clean his room and make his bed after we're done.
C:  Denver.  "I think the Broncos is a cool name"  I ask him if he knows what a "bronco" is.  "Yeah, a guy who plays football on Sunday"  Okay, I can't argue with that.
Jmann Review:  Denver.  Dallas and Tashard (third) Choice are going to have a tough time against the Kyle Orton-led offense.  Imagine that, Josh McDaniel.

NY Jets
New Orleans (-7.5)

G:  New Orleans.  "I'm never going to pick a team from New York to win.  Yankees?  No. NO!"  OK, settle down big guy
C:  New York Jets.  "Jets go really fast."
Jmann Review:  Jets.  As much as it pains me to say it, the Jets have a very good team.  I think the turf is great place for their fast defense to dominate. 

Detroit
Chicago (-10)

G:  Chicago.  "They sound like a good team."  When I ask him what that means, he stares at me.  "Can I play the Wii now if I tell you why they sound like a good team?"  I tell him no, but that he can go outside.  Guess where he is right now?
C:  Chicago.  "Bears are a lot more restless than Lions are."  Before I can ask him what the hell that means, he follows G outside.
Jmann Review: Chicago. The Bears have faced a couple of stiff defenses.  I think now that they play a couple of cupcakes, Jay Cutler will start getting going.

Write the rest of this down, Cincinnati (-7), Oakland (+9), Indianapolis (-10), New York Giants (-9), Jacksonville (+3), Tampa Bay (+7.5), Miami (Pick 'em), San Francisco (-10), San Diego (+7).  In fact, if I were betting man, I would do a three team tease taking a combination of Cincinnati, Indianapolis, Chicago, New York Giants, San Francisco and San Diego. 

Is it Really Better to Watch Football on TV?

The crowds at the urinals, the traffic, the obscenely expensive ticket prices, parking fees and beers. I've been bombarded with generalizations about how much better it is to watch football games on TV. Is it really true? Can football be more enjoyable with HDTV, a six pack and a couple of actual kids, rather than live action, $7.50 beers and several thousand "kids?"

Foxboro, MA.  8am.  September 27, 2009.  I readily admit that I was watching the Weather Channel radar this morning when I heard the rain outside my window.  I continued to watch the Weather Channel update station (where no one talks, its just a continuous loop of the doppler radar) while marinading the steak tips with my special Jameson's marinade.  I just don't have a good record with weather at football games.  Rain at the Jets game, Snow at the Jaguars game.  A couple of Dolphins games that swore me off of live football forever, or at least temporarily, as it turns out.  But it's difficult to turn down an opportunity to go to a game, even though I am so woefully unprepared for weather at football games.  Contrast with...

Home.  5pm.  September 14, 2009.  It's the first game of the season.  Tom Brady is playing his first game in months, and the Patriots have the early 7pm game of a Monday Night Doubleheader.  This is set up for a perfect TV experience.  But wait!  I find out that my wife has to work until 6pm tonight.  I'm not sure who's more bummed out, me or the kids, since they are going to have to fend for themselves for dinner and bedtime.  I figure that the 7 year old can make his younger brother and sister waffles - it is the Patriots opening night after all.  They can also get themselves some goldfish, I left the packages where they can reach them in the pantry.  That's okay, I think to myself.  Waffles and goldfish just this one time.  Besides, I was teaching Daddy's Little Girl (DLG) to say on command "Are you ready for some football?"

PREGAME:

Foxboro, MA. 9:30am.  We get to the parking lot a little late and park near the far corner.  I'm told that we're parking dangerously close to this group of very sensitive 50 year old guys who claim that corner as their own.  We park in this lot because of the proximity and ease of the HOV lane.  They park in this lot (and this corner of the lot specifically) because that is the best spot for their Bose stereo and tent placement.  They kind of look like a poor man's Sons of Anarachy.  In fact, I see one guy pay the parking attendant an extra $20 (at least) to save spots for their buddies, and park other cars at an angle to maximize their tent coverage.  Seriously?  Yes, seriously they answer as we're told six times that their buddies are coming and we need to move the tent we're setting up.  And NOW.  "Can you just wait until our tent is locked in?" my buddy asks.  "No, you see they're in line up there, they'll be here in 5 or 10 minutes." they answer.  These guys are really worried.  Luckily, I brought some cupcakes to settle everyone down.  Otherwise they really might have gone after that Falcons fan.

Home.  5:30pm.  I get a frantic call from my wife.  The gift cards that my wife so generously gave me for a couple of free rounds of golf were actually meant to be donated to her charity tournament.  "You didn't give one to my Father did you?"  "Well yeah, you told me to."  I answer.  "Damn it!"  She shrieks.  I'm not sure if she's saying this because of all of the times I picked to actually listen to her, I picked this one.  But no matter because she has to race home and then race to Hanson to get the charity golf cards and then drop them back off.  6pm is out of the question now.  "Do you mind taking one of the boys?" I, er, ask myself when she comes home to pick up one of the cards.  I'm pretty sure she didn't hear that question because it followed my question of whether she knew how to get back to the Club she just came from. 

7pm is OK, though, because I'll just crack open one of the Bud Lights I left for myself and sit...what the Hell happened to the beer I left?  Oh great.  "Daddy, I'm thirsty." DLG sweetly says to me.  "You and me both, cutie.  You and me both."

GAMETIME

Foxboro, MA.  12:55pm.  I have to admit that the 3 sausages, 10 shrimp, 8 steak tips and the three beers have made the half jog to the Stadium a little difficult.  P90X doesn't teach you fitness when you fill your stomach with toxins.  When we get to the stadium, my buddy has a great idea, that I can't help but think has been implemented before.  Although our seats are in the 300 level, let's just start the game in the 100 level, he explains.  Interesting concept, maybe just for a couple of minutes.  "Just wait until the usherette is busy helping someone and just slip in with the crowd."  Wait, this sounds a little too nefarious for my taste, but I capitulate because at this point it's easier going down stairs than up ramps.  We settle into the seats below.

To make us pay for our transgressions, the football Gods put us next to a guy from Los Angeles who is vigorously rooting against the Patriots - not for the Falcons - but against the Patriots.  Before I knew he was from L.A., I asked this tool who quarterbacked the Falcons when they went to their only Super Bowl a couple of years ago.  I couldn't remember the answer either, but who cares, I'm the one ASKING the questions here.  Finally, after the First Quarter, when it was clear that these seats weren't going to be taken away from us, I mentioned that we should go.  I had to go to the bathroom anyway.  "Come on let's stay, these seats are ours.  Just go take a leak, and when you come back, just act like you own the place."  Too tired to debate, I come back from the bathroom (with no line in the 100 Section), go the the aisle and proceed to point to a couple of people I didn't know and said "What's up!" and gave the usherette a knowing nod.  I'm not sure I know what "acting like I own the place" actually means.  My kids own my house.  One observation, I love painted faces.  My wife would kill me if I embarrassed myself in that way, but painted faces are just plain cool.  Patriots 26 Atlanta 10.

Home. 7pm.  The game starts.  I tell the boys that if they watch the game, they can stay up past their bedtimes.  I know bribery is not a good parenting practice.  "Are there going to be fireworks or muskets," my 5 year old asks, clearly still scarred from the preseason game we went to a couple of weeks before.  "Not if you sit down and don't make a sound." I gently explain to him.  I then wink at my 7 year old, who seems to get the joke.  If I'm going to bribe my kids, I might as well manipulate them into being quiet too.  Finally, my wife comes home at 7:30.  She asks me why the kids aren't in bed yet on a school night, I ask her if she got any beer to replace the ones she drank the night before.  My question didn't go over well, so I just sat back down, while she graciously put the boys to bed.  As she goes up stairs I defiantly tell her that DLG is in bed.  "Good job."  She mutters.  I proceed to watch an awful game until the last 5 minutes, but you know how it ends.  Patriots 25 Bills 24.

POSTGAME

Foxboro, MA.  4:30pm.  It's still early and everyone is happy.  A couple of the sensitive types are lying on the grass/mud near their Bose speaker.  I'm not really sure if they went in to the game or just got drunk and listened to their Snoop Dog/Lynyrd Skynyrd mix tape.  Experienced some traffic, then drank some more beer and a celebratory shot of Jamesons, then swent home a couple of hours later.  Have to go to work the next morning.

Home. 10:15pm.  Everyone is in bed.  So I go to bed, too.  Have to go to work the next morning.

Attending games in person is an expensive adventure.  These tickets are scarce (I know being on the wait list for years) and so they come with a premium.  However, there is not substitute for a football game live.  The camaraderie, the smells, the excitement just can't be duplicated no matter how many guys are in front of the TV and how clear the picture is.  I give the edge to live action.  Maybe when I get my tickets, my 5 year old won't be so afraid of the muskets and fireworks.

  

Flashforward: Where Kangaroos Might Be Important

The first time I saw the preview for the new ABC series Flashforward, I tried to draw parallels with one of my favorite TV shows, Lost.  Unfortunately, I was also obligated to draw parallels with one of the most intriguing shows to come out in the last couple of years which would only suffocate by its own weight, The Nine.  Which would it be?  Welcome to the third installment of the JMann Review Television Review.

At first, I was excited to learn that ABC was deploying its Lost corollary - have one of the stars of Lost become one of the leads of a new show.  It started with Michael last year with the Unusuals and continues with Juliet in V (I hope the red dust and fear of water continues with her new show).  I was no longer excited when the Lost character getting her own show was Penny, who in our current show plays Olivia, the do-good judging doctor.  Just as long as she's not hopelessly sailing around the world bungling every chance to meet up with Desmond, I guess it will be okay.

Six months prior to April 29, 2010.  Of course, I forget to watch it when it premieres, but I had a feeling that I was going to have another opportunity to watch, so I wasn't worried.  And of course, it was replayed the following night.  The premiere starts with our heroes waking up to mass destruction and devastation in Los Angeles.  It's interesting to see how blacking out for two minutes caused everyone to run over pedestrians precisely at the right time, accelerate into parked cars at the wrong time, fly helicopters into buildings and so on.  If I blacked out, I would probably just slump over and stab myself with my pen.  Our heroes later find out that the destruction wasn't just relegated to Los Angeles, it happened in San Diego too.  Oh well, if it happens in Los Angeles and San Diego, then it MUST be a global event, they think to themselves (or was it just me sarcastically acknowledging California's importance to the world?).

Improbably, the FBI starts piecing the mosaic of mayhem together; they discover that they all were not sleeping but actually viewing themselves six months into the future and that they all were taken to the same date (April 29, 2010).  The FBI characters include Mark, one of the above named heroes who is clearly a loose cannon and recovering alcoholic.  Mark listens to everyone's irrelevant predictions and then declares that his premonition involved looking at all of the leads while in an alcohol fueled rage (I will no longer wear any friendship bracelets that my daughter gives me) .  One must wonder though, if he is so drunk, how can he have a flashforward of himself being blacked out drunk?  What would he actually remember?  Wouldn't he just remember sleeping in his work clothes with a nasty hangover in the morning, but nothing of the night before?  Well he's doing better than the poor sap who doesn't have any flash forwards, thus leading him to the conclusion that he was dead six months later.  Did he ever stop to realize that maybe he just won't be on the show in six months? The poor sap comes up with a good line though "This is crazy.  So we're running point just because he had a premonition that we were running point?"

The show began very strong in my view.  It did not try to cram the characters down our collective throats.  The special effects and the mystery will keep those interested in that sort of thing (like Losties) hooked for the foreseeable future.  And despite the fact that I find it hard to believe that a key character and possible bad guy would be attending a Detroit Tigers game during the black out, this was a strong effort.  What did you see?  90 out of 100.

Can Courteney Cox Redefine Cougars?

Going out on the prowl for guys on Thursday nights in their best leopard print outfits, drinking cosmos by the bucketful and leaving their teenage children at home with the barely-hidden liquor cabinet keys defines your typical Cougars.  Cougars are such a well known breed that now the term is applied to any group of 30 and 40-year-old women going out together.  It's an unfair moniker...

Courteney Cox, who makes me feel old even defining herself as a Cougar, tries to redefine this genre in her new show "Cougartown".  Sensitive, timid and awkward, Cox attempts to tell us that underneath it all, Cougars are just like you and me, and not the jealous, man-eating and aggressive women you and I see at the swanky bar at happy hour.  All this despite the fact that she figuratively "licks" a high school kid's chest while the boy' mother is within earshot, has a cleavage-baring real estate sign marketing her business and flashes teenagers on their bikes.  (Seriously, that never happened to me, not even remotely close to happening.)

9:30pm. My first assignment is to determine whether we'll see the annoying Cox (from "Friends;" admit it she smacked Chandler around to such an extent that I was actively rooting for him to leave her) or the interesting and smutty Cox (from the underrated "Dirt").  The first scene includes Cox looking in the mirror at the flab on her body - I can't help but think that the producers used a body double as Cox looks pretty toned in her flashing scene - this makes me believe that she will portray this character with subtlety.  Being only a half hour show; right now it's tough to make an exact determination of whether she'll be shrill or not.   However, I didn't hear any fingernails on the chalkboard in the background, so I am encouraged by that.

Despite my optimism, things begin to disintegrate quickly into standard formulas outside of Cox.  The show centers around Cox's character and the fact that after 5 months of being divorced, she's unwilling to have fun again.  Guess what? Her "fun" friend talks her into going out on the town, where her insecurities begin coming to the surface.  No worries though since she meets her boyfriend after spilling a drink on him.  The producers obviously want us to suspend disbelief though because the boyfriend stays at the bar despite the red drink spilled on him.  Not that I'm a fussy sort of fella, but I would have split - after she paid for my shirt, of course.  They immediately hit it off, so the formula dictates that the relationship goes into the dumpster, probably around episode 2.

Having even less fun is her son, Travis, who walks in on her Mom having sex with the said twenty three year old boyfriend, has to beat up the school bully with the aforementioned real estate sign and must eat dinner chips with, and acknowledge the existence of, his loser Dad.  Things are tough for the poor kid.  Besides the teenangster, the rest of the characters seem shallow stereotypes needed for a half an hour comedy.

Cox puts on a brave face so far.  However, the writing is thin and the characters need to be developed a lot faster than they have been so far.  No matter how you cut it. I don't see this one lasting more than one season.  I read that Scream 4 is in production, so don't fret for Courteney.  She'll be OK.  78 out of 100.